


all this pain, you're right there beside me

by verus_caelum



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: 5B scenes, 5x09, Deckerstar comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Vulnerable Lucifer, after time unfreezes, fears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:20:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27748912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/verus_caelum/pseuds/verus_caelum
Summary: [Based on the 5x09 tease] Time unfreezes and Chloe finds herself alone in the evidence closet. She searches and panics, the only question on her mind being where Lucifer has gone. Turns out he’s not all that far, but she’s not the only one struggling with her emotions. The Devil needs comfort right now, and good thing he always has Chloe there beside him.“As she passed the other officers amidst the chaos, trying to regain some semblance of control, she found herself repeatedly asking, “Have you seen Lucifer?” With each negative response, she felt herself become more and more lost to her own fears…”
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Comments: 16
Kudos: 203





	all this pain, you're right there beside me

**Author's Note:**

> One of my ideas as to what could happen after time unfreezes and Chloe looks for Lucifer, after that clip from 5x09 we got :)

First, there was silence.

Then, all at once, a cacophony of noises crashed through the still air.

She felt her breath come rushing back to her as if she had been underwater. 

The first thing she noticed was that Lucifer was gone. Completely gone. One second, he had been in front of her – and he said _her name._ Then the next second, gone. Disappeared. As if he was never there. She looked around as if she could gather any information from her limited surroundings. All the evidence around her and yet none of it could give her any clue as to what was happening.

Panic began to swell within her chest – but she had to focus on what was happening around her. She needed to know where Lucifer was.

She finally found herself able to move and peeked outside of the evidence room, hearing the confusion of all the other officers in the precinct, her eyes landing on the destruction around her. Broken glass coated the entire precinct floor, turning it into a sparkling desert. Papers were strewn everywhere. Desks were overturned. Chairs were thrown. All sense of order seemed to come crashing down at the same instant.

Brushing aside her fears, her worries, her overwhelming anxiety, she pushed against the doorframe for support and firmly planted herself outside of the evidence room.

Everyone passed around her in a blur, the voices merging and unclear, as she took in the chaos around her. She felt as if she herself were distanced from her surroundings, all of the people moving around her as she stood still in the center of the motion.

She glanced around frantically, finding the faces of all her coworkers among the crowd but not finding the one she was desperately looking for. 

Her heart began to pound harder as she surveyed the precinct, the destruction around her doing nothing to alleviate her fears. The noise building around her began to become muffled, leaving her to only hear her own shallowed breathing in her panic. 

She found herself finally able to break out of her trance, able to move herself forward and take a step. And another. And another. Faster now. More desperate. More frantic. 

As she passed the other officers amidst the chaos, trying to regain some semblance of control, she found herself repeatedly asking, “Have you seen Lucifer?” She asked each person she passed, coming out as an automatic response, as she tried and failed to control her own panic. With each negative response, she felt herself become more and more lost to her own fears…

_Had something happened to him?_

_Was he alright?_

_Did someone take him away?_

_Was it Michael? Another celestial?_

_Was he injured?_

_…_

_Did he run again?_

No, she had to stop herself from thinking that. Regardless of what had happened in the evidence closet, they were at such a good point in their relationship. He wouldn’t run – not now, not after all they’ve been through. He was finally letting her in more than ever – invulnerability be damned – and she said it once and she’ll say it again, she had faith in him, in _them._

She really didn’t need to hear him say it, not really. But she couldn’t stop the fears from rising up within her, suffocating her no matter how hard she tried to push them down. It had been thousands of years for him – what if he changed his mind? What if he no longer felt the same as the day that he had left? But then she thought of how he had been when he returned – how he melted into her embrace as if he never thought he would see her again, as if after all those years, he had finally returned _home._ How he had kissed her after realizing he _chose_ to be vulnerable. All the ways he had showed her how he felt when he couldn’t find the words. She knew it, she _knew_ – so why did it hurt so much that he hadn’t said it yet?

She shook herself of her thoughts, feeling a newfound resolve rise up as she decided to move forward in her search. Wherever he was – he was alright, he was the Devil after all. Surely his invulnerability meant that even with her near, he wasn’t hurt. If anything serious had happened, he would have contacted her, he would have found some way to let her know what was happening. He no longer had to hide the celestial side of his life, and she was confident in knowing that he would let her in on this as well.

Opening every door in the precinct, looking around every corner, she found herself remembering when he had first returned. But it wasn’t actually him – it was an imposter instead, a way for her hopes to come rushing up while just as quickly come crashing back down. Now that she actually had him back – _her_ Lucifer – she could not lose him again. Would not. She would fight for what they had, regardless of where it may lead her.

Nearly ready to move her search elsewhere, Chloe opened the door to the interrogation room and froze as her eyes landed on Lucifer, feeling as if she was able to breathe once again. He was sitting on the floor in the corner of the room, knees pulled to his chest and head resting on his arms. He neither reacted when she entered the room, nor when she softly called his name. Looking at him there, he seemed smaller than she had ever remembered him looking, as if trying to curl into himself. She didn’t know what had happened in the precinct, what had caused the sudden destruction and confusion, what had gone down with Lucifer or anyone else. But she did know one thing – whatever had happened, it had deeply affected Lucifer, and right now more than ever, he needed comfort.

How often did he ever receive the comfort he needed? People are so quick to diminish him as the Devil – evil, inhuman, a monster. But did anyone else realize he was just as _human_ as everyone else? Faced the same struggles, the same pain - likely even more. Who had ever asked if the Devil needed comfort?

Slowly, she made her way over to him, not wanting to disturb his fragile state. As she came closer, she could see the small tremors wracking his entire body, hear the soft – almost inaudible – cries. She crouched down to his level and gently reached out to place her hand on his upper arm. He flinched - almost imperceptibly - at first, then leaned into her touch desperately. She began to rub his arm ever so gently, whispering reassuringly, “I’m here.”

She repositioned and lowered herself to the floor beside him, mirroring his position against the wall. Placing her arm around his shoulders, she waited a moment, taking the way he leaned into her completely as confirmation. She then pulled his body in closer to her own, pulling him into a sideways embrace. He accepted her comfort wholly, melting into her embrace as he sank down further. His tremors began to slow and his breathing became deeper as they sat there together, her continuing the comforting rub of her hand on his arm. 

They sat there together for a moment, a minute, an eternity – she couldn’t tell as time began to bleed together. All she knew was that he was here, he was safe, and she wasn’t going to leave him, not ever again if she could help it.

She leaned down to press a kiss to his temple, then rested her head against his. As she pulled him in closer, he sank even further into her, almost as if he was afraid she would disappear if he let her go. She began to stroke her fingers through his hair affectionately, making sure to be gentle while communicating all the love she felt for him. He hummed approvingly as the tension began to drain from his shoulders, his cries quieting as she whispered into his ear,

“I’m not going anywhere.”


End file.
